CHEAT Loaf

I've had some weird meatless loaves in my time. Special K loaf. Nut loaf. Neat loaf. Peace loaf. Lentil loaf.

Every single one of them interesting in its own right, some of them actually tasty, but none of them anywhere close to the flavor or texture of the meatloaves of my childhood. So I began to experiment. I didn't want to use prepared frozen veggie ground, instead preferring to start with a nearly blank slate of TVP so that I could control all the flavors. After an experimental trial, I've come up with the best vegetarian "meat" loaf I've ever had.

- 2 cups TVP
- 1 1/2 cup boiling water
- 3/4 cup rolled oats
- 1 packet onion soup mix
- 2 veggie bullion cubes
- 1 small can tomato paste
- 2 tablespoons Marmite
- 4 tablespoons vegetarian Worcestershire sauce
- 2 tablespoons soy sauce
- 4 cloves garlic, crushed
- 1 large onion, finely chopped
- 6 oz mushrooms, chopped
- 1 tablespoon olive oil
- 1 teaspoon dried oregano
- 1/2 teaspoon freshly ground pepper
- 1 teaspoon dried thyme
- 3/4 cup vital wheat gluten
- 2 eggs, slightly beaten
- 1 teaspoon salt (optional)

Glaze:
- 1 tablespoon ketchup
- 1 tablespoon mustard
- 1 tablespoon brown sugar

Stir together the TVP, oats, onion soup mix, tomato paste, Marmite, Worcestershire, bullion cubes and soy sauce. Pour the boiling water over the mixture, stir briefly, cover and let stand for at least 10 minutes while you prepare the rest of the loaf ingredients.

Saute the onion and mushroom in oil until the onion is translucent and the mushroom is thoroughly cooked. Remove from heat and add the oregano, pepper, and thyme. Cool slightly before combining with the TVP mixture.

Combine the onion mixture, gluten flour, and eggs with the TVP mixture, add salt (if desired) and stir well. Pack the loaf mixture tightly into a well oiled loaf pan, cover with foil, and bake 45 minutes at 350F. Mix all glaze ingredients together, remove foil, spread glaze over the top and bake 30 minutes more. Cool 20 minutes in the pan, gently loosen all edges, slice thickly and enjoy! Makes 10 half-inch slices.

Makes GREAT sandwiches, too.

Also, if you prefer a flatter (ciabatta-shaped) loaf, you can shape it freeform on a baking pan. This gives a greater glaze-to-loaf ratio which I find pleasing, but prefer the easily-sandwiched square shape provided by the loaf pan. For me, making Cheatloaf is really just an excuse to make Cheatloaf sandwiches!

Additional tip: For a more personalized nostalgia experiment, alter the flavorings (herbs, different soup packet, cracker crumbs instead of oatmeal, ketchup on top instead of the mustard glaze, etc) to fit whatever YOUR MOM used to put in her meatloaf! Only don't remove the Marmite, unless she made turkey loaf or something. The Marmite is a really important component of the base flavor of the loaf.

OH, AND. If you use egg replacer instead of eggs (and vegan versions of anything I might not know isn't vegan), this loaf is VEGAN! It's also pretty dang cheap--the most expensive parts are the jar of Marmite and the wheat gluten, and each of those will make several loaves or can be used in other things (tiger toast for the Marmite, homemade seitan for the gluten).